Isle of Remote

What the heck is going on in my life? So many weird things! First there’s the thing with people I knew 20 years ago popping up in my life once again - I met my old roommate at a random convention last month. This week, my best friend through high school sent me an email. I’ve also heard from a couple of other people I would count as acquaintances (too lazy to see if I spelled that right, sorry!) who have wanted to get together. Add to that the phone calls, the invitation to a graduation party, running into old friends at the grocery store and the visiting relatives and I’m just stunned. I keep thinking I’m either getting married or dying! If Miss Gartman, my first grade teacher, shows up out of the blue, I’m cashing in the chips!

Is this the result of praying for more “intentional” friendships?

Additionally, I am now one of the new Bible study leaders for next year. Yeah, what? Still stunned about that one. Do they know what they’re in for? Who knows - good gosh! What if I make them all liberal? Is [i]this[/i] the result of praying for more challenges in ministry?

And my mom. Now all of sudden she’s worried that I’ll end up alone with a couple dozen cats and I’ll get sick and there will be no one around to take care of me. Whatever. I told her she could sign me up for one of those online things….didn’t know she’d take me seriously. Haven’t decided which service to go for yet - we’ll see when I have some free time to do some research. Is this the result of praying for romance in my life?

New HD is humming along quite nicely. Although last night the sound card wouldn’t load. Took me almost 2 hours to get the thing going! Had to update explorer today because I kept getting a funky error message. Annoying. So far, tonight is good. Free hard drive? Installed? This [i]is[/i] the result of praying for a computer fix that didn’t cost me money. Talk about God being in the details…..

I’ve got a crazy weekend going - class, brunch, meetings, and more. Really, I think I need a 3-day work week at the 5-day week pay. Is that job out there somewhere? Ugh, and I’ve got to schedule 3 interviews too! Interview features are tough for me - I always think they sound stilted and contrived.

Oh my, I was writing so fast I nearly forgot I was sleepy! I gotta catch a nap!

Peace!

So, my computer is “fixed.” We (and I mean ‘we’ in the royal sense) installed a new hard drive, cleaned the old one and that HD is now a dedicated Sims drive. So I now have 2 hard drives - so at least when one crashes I have another to fall back on, correct?

It is hotter than …. hot. I hope this isn’t an indication of the summer to come! Seems though that the weather does that every year and then May and June are dreary and grey. Weather talk - an indication I need to end this and pick it up when I have something interesting to say.

‘kay, so I haven’t been able to post for a few days. The little computer glitch turned out to be a “device failure”. I’ve got the boys looking it over, installing a new hard drive (FREE) and checking the whole she-bang. (Oh snap! Now I’ve got that stupid William Hung version slamming around my brain again!)

And since I’m not really writing in a diary right now, I’m sort of at a loss. I had to write an article in long hand and I felt like I couldn’t keep up with my thoughts. If you only knew how long it took me to train myself to write on computer! I always thought I needed that tactile pen to paper connection to get the real me to page, but I knew I had to make the switch. Seriously, it took 3-5 years before the computer was my go-to choice.

I’m having a terrible allergy attack. I haven’t had one this bad since leaving the east coast. I’m blaming global warming and the ozone layer. And the clubbing of baby seals.

Speaking of which, I saw the new Arthur Miller play this weekend - Resurrection Blues. Very stunning. Now that’s a writer! He’s just so clever with words - and such a storyteller. I wonder if I’ve read everything he’s written? I’ll have to check that to make sure. Anyway, I’m also very happy that I got to shake hands with John de Lancie, one of the leads - I think he’s brilliant. He takes the most quirky, unbelievable characters (did you see him on Days of Our Lives?) and makes them human - gives them breath and soul. An amazing ability, that. If you don’t know who de Lancie is, he played Q on Star Trek. I think I’m going to put him on my list.

I’m told that everyone has a “list” of those they get a wild card to do whatever - no holds barred - with.

Who’s on my list:

1. Lenny Kravitz
2. Scott Bakula
3. Jimmy Smits
4. Thomas Mikal Ford
5. John de Lancie

You get one extra freaky-deaky one, I decided. And you don’t have to qualify it. Michael Dorn as Worf is mine. Not the actor (although he’s not bad) but the character…in full regalia…. do with that information what you will.

Hmm. Probably not the right moment to say I was asked on Saturday to lead a Bible study group for one year. Ha! I guess I’m still not over the whole “everyone is so much more holier than me” thing yet. But really, if they knew what was going on in my head half the time, would they still have asked me? And you have to be sort of nominated. They don’t just pick any old person. I’m going to do it, simply because I feel that God is leading me in this direction. Don’t know why, but still. I just hope He knows what He’s doing?

Was going to write a nice long entry, but it’s taken my computer 3+ minutes to load up the page. Driving me crazy! This is the second computer I’ve had do this (slow down so much it ceases to be useable) and this time I think I’ve pinpointed it to eBay’s Turbo Lister. Right after I loaded it up I started to have performance problems. I removed it and performance was fine. Back on again, performance drops. Coincidence?

I really don’t feel like taking the thing in again so the boys can take a look at it ONE MORE TIME. I mean really - new hard drive, new video card, new processor….should be runnin’ all fine n dandy. Of course it’s always at the worst possible moment - when I have all these items to ship and a deadline on a half completed article waiting somewhere on line.

I’m gonna get me one of those birds from the Flintstones that takes dictation and “types” everything onto a stone.

So I spent tonight with my friend whose father died last week. It was special. We looked through pictures and laughed about the happy memories together and for this person I’ve never met, I suddenly feel like I missed something by not knowing him.

We looked through scads of pictures and in nearly every one, they were touching each other, smiling (not just at the camera) and looking in each photograph like they just shared the most precious moment together. It may not seem like much, but take 100-150 pictures of your family and see what’s there. Joy? Tolerance? Obligation? Unconditional love?

We addressed envelopes for the memorial service invitations. There were loads because this was a missionary family and they had been a kajillion places and knew a kajillion other missionaries. But the number of people at your funeral isn’t important - if there is only one person there out of true and sincere love for you, it is better than 1,000 who show up out of obligation.

What I thought was particularly memorable is that there was so much joy surrounding them even in grief. Hmm. The joy that surpasses understanding? Seems I’ve read that somewhere. Maybe that is a by-product of not having any regrets; words unspoken between each other.

I am happy that this family has so many happy memories of this wonderful, dedicated man. I am happy that he lived a life of love for his Savior and his family that they can celebrate his life and not mourn his passing. I am happy that he was so special that his family has happy memories even of his illness. My friend was telling me a story about something her father said and she just started laughing and then she said “those were good times.”

Always see the silver lining.

[b]Updated:[/b]
Anyway, I didnt’ write yesterday because I was busy contemplating my clutter. I’ve too much! Of course a lot of it is work related stuff that I just can’t get rid of. Oh-one day to have a studio where I can have a designated place for everything and not have to move three things to get to one.

I am going to start focusing my efforts on one area at a time and to be thorough and heartless about getting rid of stuff. Next week I’m targeting my coat closet. If you don’t hear from me after next Sunday assume the avalanche got me.

This morning started off rather uneventfully. Then around 11:30 I hear this woman screaming. My complex is set up so sound ricochets off the buildings and you can never quite tell where it’s coming from. Well, at first she wasn’t yelling very loud - and sometimes you can’t tell if people are just really loud or if they’re fighting. So I go outside to my patio. Still can’t tell where the sound is coming from until someone walks by and looks at their door. The woman is really going at it now. I can hear the guy but he sounds calm - like he’s trying to placate her. You could kind of tell she was totally off the handle cuz the things she was saying weren’t making logical sense. “You think you’re God, don’t you? Yeah, you do! I’m not yelling! Fine, you want to leave? Pack your &^#* and go then! I’m not stupid. Do you think I’m stupid?” This was all in one paragraph.

So anyway, it goes on for about 15 minutes and then she starts getting REALLY loud. I yell out my window that I’m calling the police - for God’s sake! This ain’t the ghetto! You wanna have a fight - shut your windows and your doors please!

Long story short: About 20 minutes after I call, the police (3 of ‘em) show up and take her off in handcuffs. They went inside and talked to them for a good long time before they led her away. But here’s the thing. Okay, she was yelling and screaming, totally mad-dogging it, yet when they led her off she was calm and had this stupid smile on her face. Is that jacked or what? I’d be totally pissed if I got arrested mainly because I would have to waste my hard-earned money on getting my sorry, angry behind out of jail.

After my bout with red dye allergy I just went to bed. I have this theory that if you feel bad for whatever reason, you won’t feel bad when you’re sleeping. Don’t know if that’s really true or not, but it seems to work for me. Anyway, this morning I took an extra-long shower and scrubbed and exfoliated and super conditioned. I feel like I’ve lost 10 pounds…. Hmmmm. Maybe if I kept on exfoliating?

Wednesday night one of my friends’ lost her father. It wasn’t a surprise as he had recently been diagnosed with a very virulent incurable brain tumor, but still it was kind of “unfair”. I mean there are thousands of dads out there who don’t care about their kids, haven’t taken the time to share their lives….why couldn’t we have one less of them? Here was a good father who loved his wife and his kids… yeah, I know - it’s just the way I feel sometimes.

Just a quick shoutout to [b]meadow[/b] - thanks for your concern - no more red dye for me!

Clicked enter at 10:51! Tax Battle is O-Vuh! Of course this is a bittersweet moment…have to pay! Yuck! Like I’m rolling in dough here as I contemplate buying toilet paper or milk….Okay it’s not that bad, but it has been. And let me tell you, milk won out just about every time - You can always take home extra TP from public restrooms if you’re desparate.

Ugh! I ate something with red dye today apparently (starburst?) and now, because I’m allergic, I’m a big itchy mess right now. I mean really itchy. I don’t think I have any Benadryl either.

So, in lieu of a real entry please enjoy the following heartfelt tribute to the moon:

[url=http://www.rathergood.com/moon_song]Spongmonkeys[/url]

GAK! I’m crazed - that’s why I’m adding an entry here, now, in the middle of my workday. Had a freak occurence with a hotel reservation and it nearly resulted in our very important speaker being left in a hotel lobby for 2 hours staring at the walls. Then I was left to argue semantics with the staff….not the way I wanted to start my day!

Enough of that - the situation is resolved and rethinking it just gets me upset.

Yesterday a newspaper features editor told me he liked my writing! He’s giving me some pointers on how to write feature articles, which I seem to have more of a knack for than I thought. It’s amazing how someone can tell you something bad about yourself and you carry it with you forever.

I had always wanted to be a writer and my writing was always praised by my teachers. However, I took this journalism class as a freshman and this woman was, I think now, unnecessarily cruel. I think that yes, you should encourage your students to excellence, but to mark papers down TWO whole grade points because of ONE minor error, was a little harsh. I could maybe understand one point maybe if it was a careless mistake, a misspelling or problem with verb tense or something like that, but she would take her stupid green pen and mark away then give an otherwise A paper a C because of a footnote notation or a fragmented sentence. What an arrow-slinger! I changed my major and never wrote for anyone other than myself for the next 15 or so years.

She was always comparing us to professional writers. Saying that a professional writer wouldn’t make these kind of mistakes. Hey, we were just a bunch of freshmen trying to satisfy a general ed requirement, you know? Most of the people in the class had no desire to be professional writers. Three years later I find that the stuff she was expecting us to be expert at were things we learned in upper level courses.

Careless words sometimes do more damage than deliberately hurtful ones.

So anyway, back to the good news. Here I am with next to no confidence in my writing - just doing it for my own enjoyment and bing bang boom - I’ve got not one but now 3 regular gigs! How cool is that?

I’m diggin’ on the emoticons today, huh? I don’t know if that is good or bad.

I am a ridiculously happy girl right now. Three reasons: one - Berkeley Breathed is back in the Sunday comics with Opus. Two - My Bro friend called me and all is well. He sounds positive. And three - the editor called and wants to discuss my writing! Wahoo!

I’ve not seen my buddies, EyeCandy nor Bro in a few weeks. Neither have answered my messages. I’m a little worried about both. I’m going to try EyeCandy again on the way home. Him I’m not so worried about - he has 3 jobs. But I did used to see him at least once a week. It’s Bro that has most of my worries - last I spoke to him he was not in a good place. But he always calls me or emails me. We went to dinner 2 weeks ago and he was really kind of down and negative. Which, given his current situation, is understandable. But isn’t that a warning signal when someone cuts themself off from their friends? I’ll keep plugging away this week and see if maybe he just went on extended vaca or something.

Well, enough about them and more about me….

I am very tired today. And I’m in pain. I really have to start taking better care of myself, you know? At this moment I have plans to exercise when I get home. Yoga maybe won’t reinjure me. And definitely sit-ups. My waistbands are starting to leave indentations!

I have to call my mother today. She called as I was heading off to dinner and I was probably kind of short with her. I hate it when she states the obvious. She tells me how to say things, like if I want a raincheck from Target she’ll say, “just go to the customer service and tell them you bought this printer and it was faulty and you’d like your money back.” Like they’re going to give me trouble or that I’m unable to form a simple sentence and communicate when it’s WHAT I DO FOR A LIVING. Sigh. Parents - gotta love ‘em! Knowing she means well, helps most of the time, but probably 5% of the time it makes me crazy. That and her telling me jobs to apply for that I would in no way be good at. Actually, that’s kind of funny, but sometimes that horse is a bloody carcass before we can move on to another topic!

I’m bored at work. I don’t have enough to do. Even though I am looking for something else, it doesn’t seem like the opportunity is going to jump up and smack me in the face tomorrow AM. I mean, I can only shuffle the same papers around so many times, right? I don’ t think they really care one way or another about what I do here, so long as I keep doing it.

I sound flaky. Let’s blame it on my head injury, shall we? I nearly concussed myself Saturday evening - whacked my noggin but good on the hood of my car. Actually saw those little cartoon birdies flying around my head like Sylvester when Tweety Bird drops an anvil on his head. Speaking of which, I’m curious to find out the history of the anvil in the American cartoon….anyone? Anyone?

Geesh, like I said…concussed…can you tell? I have a lump and a scab. Lovely image, no? I think this is the part where I go take a nap and never wake up.